
Wondering what a $5,000 cake tastes like? Pat Alderton has you covered with his own ‘student friendly’ Art Gallery Anniversary cake recipe.
You may have heard about the near $5,000 cake which NSW Premier Gladys Berejiklian and Arts Minister Don Harwin indulged in as a part of the 150th anniversary of the Art Gallery of NSW. If you haven’t, you can find all you need to know right here:
Every time the NSW Liberal / National Govt say they can't afford something remember that time they spent $10,000 on a cake…👀👀👀#nswpol pic.twitter.com/Aq8cvTQQfK
— Rose Jackson (@RoseBJackson) June 10, 2021
The delicious ball of icing, coated coconut and chocolate flavoured ganache cake, cost a whopping $4897.
The event also ensured that its guests need not worry about being rained on as they left, shelling out $20,000 on umbrellas.
But what if you could make a cake just as good for a fraction of the price? Following below is a recipe for the most scrumptious (and affordable) Art Gallery Anniversary cake you will ever make!
For this recipe, you will need:
- 1/2 cup (113 grams) butter, room temperature
- 1/3 cup (70 grams) white sugar
- A $5000 loan, paid entirely by taxpayers
- 2 ounces (56 grams) dark chocolate
- 1/2 cup sweetened coconut flakes
- 1 1/2 cups (180 grams) self-rising flour
- 4 ounces milk chocolate, roughly chopped
- 2 cups of taxpayer tears
- 1/2 cup of grated gold
Instructions:
- Preheat oven to 175C (350 Fahrenheit) and grease an 8-inch round cake pan.
- In a mixing bowl, add sugar and butter, beat on low until light and fluffy, about 2-3 minutes.
- Beat in the eggs, one at a time, and mix well.
- Stir in the grated chocolate, sweetened coconut, and grated gold.
- Realise you cannot get a $5000 loan, because you are a full-time University Student.
- Fill a third cup with your own tears, combine with the taxpayer tears.
- Break down, cry, and realise you will never be able to replicate this cake.
- Go to Woolworths and buy a $3 chocolate mud cake.
By following these simple steps, you now have a delicious, and affordable cake in your grasps with little to no effort at all. Although, it should be noted that your cake probably won’t taste like $5000, and you’ll probably be faced with an earth-shattering existential crisis.
But at least you tried, right?
What’s that? You forgot to buy an umbrella when you were out and about? Perfect! The rain will wash away your tears, and nobody will know you’ve been crying.
Happy baking, everyone.
Feature image by Will Echols via Unsplash, no changes made.